1. Read ASAP! · Book Review Actions · Book Reviews · Psychology · Self Improvement

BR 125: Willpower by Roy Baumeister

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Category: 1 – Read ASAP! (All Categories are 1 – Read ASAP!, 2 – BUY it!, 3 – SHELF it, 4 – SOMEDAY it)

Comments: Brilliant book by one of the pioneers of Willpower research.

Top 3 learnings:

1. Will power is like a muscle. There is only so much reserve we have until we recharge. That reserve is what we tap into for various activities in a day – primarily in the categories of resisting temptations and doing things that we don’t want to do that are generally good for us.

For example, we extract will power out of this reserve to resist a delicious chocolate snack as well as to keep patience while interacting with a frustrating co-worker.

2. Ego depletion is a serious issue. The depletion of this will power reserve results in ego depletion. Ego depletion is interesting – all of a sudden we lose self control and hit the “what the hell” effect. As a result, we suddenly irrationally indulge. So, if we hit ego depletion while on a diet, we suddenly go on a crazy binge.

Ego depletion explains why important people often make really stupid decisions in their personal life – sex scandals, etc. Decision making plays havoc with will power and ego depletion results in indulgence.

So, how do we prevent ego depletion? a) Food at regular intervals as glucose is critical to will power b) Sleep – the only long term recharge available!

(Ego depletion is what is referred to in the quote “things will look better in the morning”)

3. The best use of will power is to form habits.

Let’s take an example – I want to exercise every morning before I get to work. It’s not sustainable to keep using will power every day as I’ll start the day with very little in reserve. Instead, I ought to use the will power to create a cue, habit and reward to create a sustainable exercise habit. Once this is done, I won’t have to worry about exercise since it becomes an automatic process.

This explains what successful people do well. They use their will power reserves wisely to create great habits!

(See our learnographic for a summary)

2. BUY it! · Book Review Actions · Book Reviews · Entrepreneurship · Novel Concepts and Interesting Research · Self Improvement

BR 124: The Icarus Deception by Seth Godin

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Priority: 2 – BUY it!  (All Categories are 1) Read ASAP! 2) BUY it! 3) SHELF it 4) SOMEDAY it)

Comments: I really enjoyed “The Icarus Deception.” I am sure this rating comes with a few biases – I am a huge fan of Seth’s work. I love Seth’s blog and I am very appreciative of the fact that he’s taken the time to respond to many of my questions to him and even read and comment on my blog every once a while. He walks his talk.

The Icarus Deception meant a coming together of many interesting concepts for me. His explanation of work we do as “art” resonated as well as many really inspirational learnings on “the infinite game.”

This is not a step-by-step sort of book. Very high level and conceptual. And, very inspiring if you are aligned with Seth’s world view.

Top 3 learnings:

1. “Art is an attitude, culturally driven and available to everyone who chooses to adopt it. Art isn’t something sold in a gallery or performed on a stage. Art is the unique work of a human being, work that touches another. Most painters, it turns out, aren’t artists after all – they are safety seeking copycats.

Art isn’t something that’s made by artists. Artists are people who make art. ”

2. While the differences between work and play are widely documented, the differences between the  “finite” game and the “infinite” game are not.

The finite game theory assumes that life is a series of finite games with winners and losers. There is pressure to be the “one.”

The infinite game theory has a different purpose – the purpose is to help other players play better! It isn’t about winning and losing but about the joy of playing. The wonderful thing about the infinite game is that you avoid the manic highs or lows.. The privilege is in playing.

3. Seth’s advice to his younger self.

“But the one thing I wish I had known then was that whatever happens, things are going to fine in the end, that the pain is part of the journey, and that without the pain there really isn’t a journey worth going on.

No, it doesn’t all work, but you always get to dance. Win or lose, you get to play. I would tell myself not to put so much emotional baggage on every project and every interaction. The goal is to keep playing, not to win.

At the end of a project, the end of the day, and the end of the game, you can look yourself in the mirror and remind yourself that at least you go to dance.”

More on http://www.alearningaday.com/2013/02/on-infinite-game

(The only trouble with sharing Seth’s learnings is that I am forced to quote them. That’s because they are so well written that any paraphrasing makes it less crisp and meaningful. A great example of where I’d like to be as a writer.)

Add on Mar 16, 2016: Seth’s advise to his younger self about  getting rid of what he termed the “manic high” and focusing on playing the infinite game is an idea that has stayed with me.

4. SOMEDAY it · Book Review Actions · Book Reviews · Career · Entrepreneurship

BR 123: The Millionaire Upgrade by Richard Parkes Cordock

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Category: 4 – SOMEDAY it (All Categories are 1 – Read ASAP!, 2 – BUY it!, 3 – SHELF it, 4 – SOMEDAY it)

Comments: This book was a real disappointment. I hardly ever put in books in the someday category but exceptions had to be made. I decided to listen to it as I was eager to get through a short book on a flight. I did.. And I was disappointed by the insight.

Perhaps this is a consequence of having read many great books on  career and entrepreneurship (So Good They Can’t Ignore You comes to mind), I found the book’s advice rhetorical – “follow your passion”, etc.

Top 3 learnings:

I’m going to pass on this for this book.

3. SHELF it · Book Review Actions · Book Reviews · Psychology

BR 122: Stumbling on Happiness by Dan Gilbert

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Category: 3 – SHELF it (All Categories are 1 – Read ASAP!, 2 – BUY it!, 3 – SHELF it, 4 – SOMEDAY it)

Comments: This is a very good book and almost makes it to the “Buy it!” list. The trouble I had with it is that there is no structure and this makes it rather difficult to absorb in the audio version. Some really really good insights, though.

Top 3 learnings:

1. The best way to sustain happiness is to do something in intervals. So, if you have access to something amazing, do it in intervals e.g. a fancy meal every few weeks vs every day.

2. We greatly underestimate 2 big factors in our judging of our experience – the strength of our personal immune system and our ability to project our current feelings into the future.

As a result, we underestimate how well we will cope with most kinds of adversity/loss. And, we make very poor predictions of how we will feel after an experience

3.  Surrogation (i.e. making a judgment based on someone else’s experience) is a very interesting technique to gauge happiness. We like  thinking we are unique but in reality, we are not. So, the best way to judge if you will be happy after a decision to ask others who’ve been through the experience. There is a certain wisdom in the crowd.

2. BUY it! · Novel Concepts and Interesting Research · Psychology · Self Improvement

BR 121: The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg

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Priority: 2 – BUY It!  (All Categories are 1) Read ASAP! 2) BUY it! 3) SHELF it 4) SOMEDAY it)

Comments: Great research put together by an excellent writer. It is the equivalent of a Dan Brown-esque page turner for the psychology genre.

Top 3 Learnings:

1. We are creatures of habit – every one of us – much more than we realize. Habits are the “efficiency” unit of our brains and almost everything we do comes down to the habits we have in place. Luckily, these habits can be shaped and broken. Great people are just by-products of great habits.

2. A habit is a combination of a cue, an routine and a reward. e.g. To form an exercise habit, the cue could be leaving your clothes near your bed, the routine is exercise of course and the reward could be a cup of coffee!

3. There are some habits that are critical – called keystone habits. These are habits that influence almost all other habits. For manufacturing companies like Alcoa, safety was found to be the keystone habit. For humans, it has been found to be exercise.. (this has inspired me to no end to change exercise routines from 2-3 times a week to 5 times a week).

3. SHELF it · Book Review Actions · Book Reviews · Philosophy · Psychology

BR 120: Authentic Happiness by Martin E.P. Seligman

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Category: 3 – SHELF it (All Categories are 1 – Read ASAP!, 2 – BUY it!, 3 – SHELF it, 4 – SOMEDAY it)

Comments: Martin E.P. Seligman is the father of positive psychology and his book lived up to expectations. I didn’t find it “ground breaking” and that’s thanks to having read many a happiness book that builds on Seligman’s ground break findings.

The only miss is the lack of a “framework” in the book. I remember it as a collection of great anecdotes, many of which I’m sure to write about. I’ve always maintained that great books give you a framework in which to remember the key learnings – e.g. the 7 habits of highly effective people by Stephen Covey.

Top 3 Learnings

1. Two groups of school kids were studied for their happiness level. Group I involved the geeky kids who studied hard, attended various classes after school and played hard. Group II involved the “cool” kids who hung out in the mall. It was found that the geeky kids tested happier on every aspect except one – they thought the kids in the mall were happier.

What an awesome story.

2. Optimism is an acquired trait based on the 3 P’s – Permanence, Pervasiveness and Personalization. Optimists don’t believe a bad event is permanent, pervasive and that the world is “out to get them.”

3. Expressing anger and negative emotions does NOT help – contrary to popular belief.

1. Read ASAP! · Bio/Autobiographies · Book Review Actions · Book Reviews · Philosophy · Psychology

BR 119: Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor.E.Frankl

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Category: 1 – Read ASAP! (All Categories are 1 – Read ASAP!, 2 – BUY it!, 3 – SHELF it, 4 – SOMEDAY it)

Comments: Man’s search for meaning is as sincere and heartfelt a book you will find. It’s one of those books that is a must read simply because it teaches us what it means to be human.

The story details the experiences of Dr Frankl in Nazi concentration camps and his observations about life and the importance of meaning.

Top 3 Learnings:

1. We are often told that the essence of life is the pursuit of happiness. Frankl’s experiences taught him otherwise. In his experience, it’s meaning that makes life worth living..

2. There is an incredible paragraph on love by Viktor Frankl. It’s one of those that reminds us of the importance of love in this world, and the special place it holds in our life.

3. Success and happiness will ensue if we keep doing the right things. At the end of the day, we will be successful only because we forgot to think about it. Here’s the link to that incredible paragraph.

3. SHELF it · Book Review Actions · Book Reviews · History

BR 118: The Art of War by Sun Tzu

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Category: 3 – SHELF it (All Categories are 1 – Read ASAP!, 2 – BUY it!, 3 – SHELF it, 4 – SOMEDAY it)

Comments: I am guessing the original (Chinese) version is one with stories behind the principles. My audio book was a short 1 hour 2o minute listen with a summary of principles. Thanks to the absence of stories, they didn’t really stick. Age old war wisdom though.

Top 3 learnings:

1. You only move as a general when your odds are favorable. Bravado is foolish. At every point, it’s about staying rational and improving your odds.  A general is not the same as warrior..

2. Everything in life is about a few basic things. 3 basic colors give rise to a whole spectrum of colors – similarly, war (and, as an extension, everything else) has a few very basic principles. Ensure you know them well.

3. Control of communication and discipline is incredibly important if managing large groups. “Never attack an army whose banners are upright.”

1. Read ASAP! · Book Review Actions · Career · Entrepreneurship · Self Improvement

BR 117: So Good They Can’t Ignore You by Cal Newport

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Category: 1 – Read ASAP! (All Categories are 1 – Read ASAP!, 2 – BUY it!, 3 – SHELF it, 4 – SOMEDAY it)

Comments: Top draw. Probably the best career book out there. Busts some really common myths and is really SO good you shouldn’t ignore it.

Top 3 learnings:

1. Follow your passion is bad advice. Working right trumps finding the right work. It is  all about “the approach” to work.

2. Adopt the “craftsman mindset” i.e. the mindset of someone who is willing to put in the hours of deliberate practice to hone their craft. Adopting this mindset means you focus your energies on being the best you can be. This, in turn, gives you career capital.

3. Once you get damn good, the chances are that you will love what you do thanks to being the craftsman. You can now also trade career capital in for more control and autonomy in your life.

Once again, top draw career book.

1. Read ASAP! · Novel Concepts and Interesting Research · Psychology

BR 116: The Honest Truth About Dishonesty by Dan Ariely

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Category: 1 – Read ASAP! (All Categories are 1 – Read ASAP!, 2 – BUY it!, 3 – SHELF it, 4 – SOMEDAY it)

Comments: Another Dan Ariely masterclass with very practical information about cheating. Very useful for us when we define “trust” systems as well as in our lifelong quest to manage ourselves.

Top 3 learnings:

1. Most people, when given a chance, cheat just a little bit. The reason for the “little bit” is that we work hard to stay consistent with our self image of being honest, straightforward people. But, at the same time, we find it hard to resist easy gains when we feel we cannot be found out.

2. Any reminders of ethics and responsibilities completely removes this cheating element e.g. students who were asked to recollect the ten commandments before heading into this experiment did not cheap. Similarly, signing honor codes etc at the start of the document prevent all cheating.

3. Every little act of cheating gives rise to more. In a fascinating set of experiments, it was found that people who fear fake brands or rip offs were more likely to cheat and view the world with a more suspicious lens that people who didn’t. This was a big insight for me.

Essentially, the cost of fakes and illegal downloads goes far beyond reducing profits of the companies involved.